Complicated

Note : This story is a work of fiction and any resemblance in name, place etc to any person is purely coincidental.

 

 

 

Amrita was just another girl who had just turned twenty. She was very lucky woman for her age because she was in a no time-pass no nonsense long term relationship. There was no question as to the fact that she was very much in love with the man who loved her equally. Also their relationship was much mature owing to the fact that it was not a week or month old but had been there for a long time now.

Even in those moments when she was angry or upset at him, there was never even a thought that she might not love him or vice versa. Obviously not everything was picture perfect, but she understood that so was the case in every relationship of every kind.  The differences of opinion she had with him did not dampen their love.

Still, there was one ‘little complication’ in her heart. Though she loved dearly her boyfriend and was completely loyal to him, her heart was divided in two as she also loved dearly another man. When she had first met him, it had seemed to Amrita that this other man was no more than a fleeting crush. A feeling that would go away soon. It didn’t.

With the passage of time, her love for both men grew. While many thought it was impossible to love two people in the same manner at the same time, she disagreed. If it was perfectly normal to be in love with two men at different times, why was it any different if both were present at one time. Love is an emotion and it is not something that happens systematically as to only fall in love once you no longer love another person. In actuality, there can never be falling out of love, so she loved them both.

 

 

Now, while loving the other man, she knew very clearly that relationships were the last thing he was looking for. His calling in life was different and falling in love was something he actively avoided. Also she was sure that he was the kind of person to leave decisions such as that of a life partner on his parents or other people he trusted in that regard.

However, Amrita was fearful. She feared that if someday, her ‘second love’ did indeed fall in love, how would she react? How would she react if he fell in love with another woman? But more importantly, how would she react if he fell in love with her? He knew very well she was in a relationship, but what if in some manner she were to come to know of his love for her. What would she do then?

The choice between the two men she loved would maybe drive her crazy. And though she loved the second man with all her heart, just like she loved the first one, she knew not what to hope for in the future. Should she hope for the man to love another and move away or should she hope for him to fall in love with her and stay?

Amrita had no answers to her mindset and knew that it was, to put it simply, “complicated”.

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The Many Faces of Love… ~1~

“If you love someone, let them go. If they were meant for you, they will return, otherwise, they were never yours in the first place.”

This has been said and read so much that it would be engrained in many minds, that it would be the first thing anyone might say to someone who has just had their heart broken.

But is it that easy? Of course not. Maybe to say, but not actually to do. And no, it doesn’t necessarily have to be a “romantic” love that you need to let go at times. There is love in friendship, but to build it over years and then suddenly, one fine day, say “I’m sad, and I need to be alone to solve it, so please understand me, and go away” is not at all easy. Not for the one who says, or for the one who does. In such a case, does that saying make any sense? If you were close, and you never felt the need to be alone, or let go of them because you loved them for so many years, why suddenly let go? Over the years, it’s that love which has seen you through your highs and your lows, happiness and sadness… When you need that love the most, why the thought arises that you need to be alone to solve it? I can’t quite understand that line of thought at all.

Knowing

It is a much debated issue as to when do we come to know that it truly is love and not infatuation. In short, how does one differentiate between infatuation and the real thing?

Here’s how. Patience. IF it’s infatuation, some day soon it will be lost OR becoming centric to one part of the person’s personality. Eg: You might like only the way (s)he talks or sings etc.  So if after a period of time you start to like one or more characteristics of a person you can rest assured it is not love.

There’s another important lesson here. We cannot ‘love’ a person for his qualities. This is best explained by the line, ‘ If you can find a reason for your love for someone, then it is not love’. And that’s true. Love is a complete package and if one is able to break it into components it is not going to last.

This is simply for the reason that the other person is bound to change someday, no one stays the same in any aspect throughout their life. And when that change comes, what happens to your love?

So all those people, who say that you love the other person BECAUSE…………. face the light, it’s not love. Here’s an example to prove my point : For someone who says I love the other person for the way I am important to that person and the way (s)he cares for me; there will be days that the two of you will have fights or the other person may be unable to give you time and importance for some reason. And yes, such a time WILL come. So then would you stop loving?

Think about it.